Only You
by PaperclipHearts
Summary: Tony is desperate to get Ziva to spend Valentine's Day with him. Tiva; a multichapter fic. Countdown to Valentine's Day!
1. The Absence of a Presence

A/N: Hey everyone, it's Soph! What, you didn't think we'd let Valentine's Day pass us by, did you? Okay, so for those of you who are new, this is a collaboration fic between myself (Anonymous033) and Ash (ZandVsupporter). We will alternate between chapters, and this fic will have 8 chapters. The first chapter is written by me.

Summary: Tony is desperate to get Ziva to spend Valentine's Day with him, and well...we'll see.

Disclaimer: Ash and I don't own NCIS...yet. We'll see about that too!

.::.

**Only You**

.::.**  
**

**I. The Absence of a Presence**

_15 Days before Valentine's Day_

.::._  
_

"Good morning, Tony," the sound of Ziva's lilt made Tony's eyes snap up and away from the game that he was busy playing on his cell phone.

"Morning, Zee-vah," he replied with an impish grin before looking down at his phone again. He was soon startled by the loud thud of Ziva's elbows landing on his desk, followed by appearance of her face one inch away from his and peering curiously at his phone.

"What are you playing?"

"_Angry Birds_," Tony informed her happily, "Best game ever."

A frown appeared on Ziva's face as she watched him play. "You are shooting birds at…pigs?"

"Yup."

Ziva shuddered. "I do not know if that is even kosher." She removed her elbows from his desk and headed over to her own, powering up her computer as she laid down her coat. She smiled at McGee when he sauntered into the bullpen, coat on one arm, bag on one shoulder, and a big grin on his face. "Good morning, McGee. You seem happy today."

"Well, it's fifteen days to Valentine's Day, Ziva, and I've just gotten a date for it." McGee announced proudly.

"A date, Elf Lord?" Tony's attention was momentarily diverted from his phone. He swung around in his chair to look at McGee. "What, with one of the Elf Ladies from the game that you play?"

"The term is Ice Queen, Tony, and no. It's not. It's with a girl that I met at the supermarket yesterday."

"The supermarket?" There was a tone of disbelief in Tony's voice. "You met a girl while _grocery-shopping_?"

"Yes, Tony." McGee replied calmly. "You might too, if you went grocery-shopping more often."

Tony looked horrified at the idea. "No thanks." He hastily returned his attention to the game.

"So tell me about this girl, McGee," Ziva said, gracefully deciding to ignore Tony's interruption.

McGee sat down at his desk. "Well, her name is Angeline, and she works as a Forensic Science professor at the George Washington University. She tutors children in community centres on the weekends, and she sometimes helps out at pet shelters."

Ziva froze, and she was debating whether or not to voice out her thoughts when Tony did it for her.

"Don't you think she's just a little like Abby, Probie?"

The smile slid off McGee's face and he looked at Tony bewildered. "No! Abby doesn't teach Forensic Science."

Tony shook his head sympathetically and went back to his game. Ziva smiled reassuringly at McGee and said, "Well, I think she sounds like a wonderful match for you."

"Thank you," McGee beamed at her as Gibbs walked in.

"Enough chatter, you two." Gibbs grabbed his gun and badge out of his desk drawer. "We've got a case. Hey, DiNozzo!"

"Yes, Boss!" Tony jumped, fumbling with his phone as he nearly dropped it.

"Turn off that damn game and come with us!" Gibbs began speed-walking towards the elevator, with Ziva and McGee following close behind. Tony caught up with them just as the elevator doors started to slide shut on him.

"Anything wrong, Boss?" McGee asked in confusion as Gibbs stared unwaveringly at him inside the elevator.

Gibbs never broke eye contact. "She _is _just a little like Abby, actually."

.::.

Loud music pounded out from inside Abby's lab as Tony stepped in, a full box of evidence in his hands. He was immediately taken aback by the various shades of reds and pinks that covered all flat surfaces, strewn about in a disorderly manner. He looked around for the goth. "Abby?"

"Up here! I'll be down in just a second!" Abby's voice called down from the top of a ladder. He looked up to see her stringing a large pink paper heart to the ceiling. She knotted the string tightly and climbed back down the ladder, stepping onto the floor with a bounce of her heels. "Sorry. Was decorating my lab for Valentine's Day. What can I do for you, buckaroo?"

Tony glanced at her warily. "Buckaroo?"

Abby grinned. "I've always loved that word. Use it as much as I can. It just rolls off the tongue, don't you think? Buckaroo buckaroo buckaroo -"

"Evidence." Tony held the box out towards her.

"Right." Abby cleared her table and took the evidence box from him. She peered eagerly into it and gasped. "It's like Christmas!"

Tony grimaced. "Yeah, there was a lot of blood at the crime scene…"

"So what are you going to do for Valentine's, Tony?" Abby interrupted cheerfully as she pushed aside the box and stared at him.

Tony shrugged. "I don't know yet. Haven't decided."

Abby gave a theatrical gasp. "You haven't decided? It's fifteen days to Valentine's! You usually plan way ahead of this, Tony. This is very remiss of you. All the good women will be taken by now."

Tony thought about it. "Yeah, but I don't just want a 'good woman' to spend Valentine's Day with. I want a great woman. I'm gettin' too old for this, and I need… a meaningful relationship…" He seemed to space out as he said this.

'Hello! Earth to Tony!" Abby waved her hands exaggeratedly. "Who's this person that you want to have this meaningful relationship with?"

"Uh, no one…" Tony looked warily at her again. "I'll see you later, Abs." He turned abruptly and left the lab.

Abby looked at Bert the Hippo, who was sitting on top of a pile of red paper hearts, with a mystified expression. She picked him up and hugged him. "Someone's got his heart, and she's got it good," she told him seriously.

.::.

Tony sat pondering at his desk the next day, his mood uncharacteristically down for once. It was two weeks to Valentine's and he still had not found anyone to spend it with; it was looking more and more likely that he would be spending it alone. But the truth was that even that was preferable to the alternative of spending it with another woman in whom he had no real interest, and with whom he spent the day only because it was his habit to do so. He gave a sigh. There was only one woman he was interested in being with on Valentine's Day, and of course she was the most unattainable one.

Said unattainable woman walked into the bullpen just then, having returned from lunch with McGee. She threw a large packet onto Tony's desk. "Here is your burger, Tony."

Tony looked up at Ziva, startled. "I don't remember ordering any burgers."

"You did not. But you must not go without lunch; if you do you will be unable to concentrate in the field, and that can be very dangerous."

Tony was dumbfounded as he listened to her speech. Finally he said, "Thanks, I guess." He took the burger and unwrapped it. The fragrant smell of meat wafted up to him, making his pulse race faster. He eagerly bit into the burger. "Mmm."

Ziva smiled and sat down in front of her computer.

"So who are you going out with for Valentine's?" Tony asked her as he chewed noisily, the oily paper crinkling in his hands.

"No one, Tony." Ziva said as she began clicking on her mouse, staring intently at her screen. "I have not been asked out by anyone."

"Really? A beautiful woman like you…"

Ziva's eyes met Tony's. "Not all beautiful women get asked out for Valentine's Day. But I guess I do not mind. I can use the time to cook, and to relax at home."

"That's such a lonely way to spend Valentine's," Tony said disapprovingly.

"Do you have any better suggestions?"

"No. But I never would've taken you for the type of woman who would sit back and wait for a man to ask. I thought you would've gone and found someone to spend it with by now. "

"And who would I find to spend it with, Tony?"

Tony hesitated. "I don't know." The burger in his hands suddenly felt tasteless upon his tongue. He put it aside.

Ziva's eyes flicked to it. "Did I get you the wrong burger?"

"No; you always get me the right one." He picked up the burger again and reluctantly took another bite. It was still tasteless, but he would have eaten up soap before he admitted to her that it was she who had made him lose his appetite.

Ziva furrowed her brows at him and went back to her work. Tony watched her fingers dance across the keyboard, the concentration etched beautifully into her face and the curve of her back oh-so-tempting, and the misery in his heart grew because he couldn't figure out how he could love her so much and want her so badly, yet could never have the right to claim her as his.

.::.

A/N: That's it for the first chapter! I hope you enjoyed reading it, because I certainly enjoyed writing it. Please review! They are much appreciated; they make our days. And because I'm sure you miss Ash, I'm happy to say she'll be writing the next chapter!


	2. Seek for Help

**A/N: **Hello my fellow readers, it's me Ash! I'm so glad to be back writing for you guys. Thank you for all the reviews, both Sophy and I appreciate it. Please enjoy chapter II!

**II. Seek for Help**

_13 Days before Valentine's Day_

.::.

"Two crime scenes in three days?" Tony gave a huff as they stepped out of the van and lugged the equipment from the back. They were called in when another Petty Officer was reported dead with similar abrasions found on his body that raised a question to whether the two officers' deaths were somehow linked.

"That's gotta hurt," Tony winced as they entered the crime scene to be faced with a dead petty officer in a rather… awkward position. Ziva smirked and stopped beside him, their bodies too close to have been considered friendly.

"Would you like to try, Tony?" she said, her infectious laugh crept up before she was met with a light slap to the back of her head.

"Do you think this is funny?" Gibbs squatted and examined the man that lay before them.

"No, Gibbs…" Tony snickered quietly and was met with a painful nudge to the side from Ziva. She gave an innocent smile and continued to snap photographs.

"Oh my, poor lad… Now what did you do to face such a horrid demise young man?" Ducky stumbled in with Palmer close behind, "Sorry Jethro, Mr. Palmer here still hasn't grasped the concept of driving even at his age."

"Looks like a terrible case of stretching gone wrong," Palmer laughed and stopped abruptly when Ducky looked up disapprovingly, "Sorry Dr. Mallard." Ducky gave an exasperated sigh and continued with his examination.

"Got a time of death Duck?" Gibbs pulled out his notepad and scribbled some notes.

"Well… let's see," Ducky withdrew the metal instrument and brought it closer to his face to check the readings, "My estimation puts this poor fellow's untimely death at around 0200 this morning."

"Alright Duck, let's get him back to autopsy, you three finish up and head back," Gibbs took a sip from his coffee and left the scene.

"Is it just me or is Boss a little irked today?" McGee commented as he tagged the last of the evidence.

"Yes, well Timothy it's less than two weeks to the day we all know as Valentine's Day…" Ducky and Palmer secured the petty officer onto the stretcher and exited through the door Gibbs did a mere minute ago.

"And?" McGee rose to a standing position and approached his two colleagues.

"And his ex-wives get a little _noisy_ around this time of year," Tony gave him a pat on the shoulder and followed Ziva out. McGee sighed and picked up the equipment they'd dumped on him.

.::.

By the time the three Special Agents arrived back at the bullpen, Gibbs was already at his desk which were guarded by three Starbucks' cups, while he busied himself by rummaging through his drawers. They exchanged nervy looks and dispatched to their own desks, respectfully.

"What ya lookin' for Boss?" Tony gave a quirk of the eye towards Gibbs as he lowered down on his chair.

"Nothin'," Gibbs rubbed his eye in frustration, then after much debate in his head he rose and headed towards Abby's lab, hoping for a turn of events.

"Man… and I thought I was the one acting weird," Tony mumbled and shook his head; he regretted those words the moment Ziva's eyes darted up to his.

"Why are you acting weird Tony?" she stopped her work completely, leant over her desk and eyed him.

"Nothin'," he mirrored her actions. He gave himself a mental head slap for letting his tongue slip up like that.

"Tony, is something wrong? You –"

"Everything's fine, everything is _juuust_ fine," he dodged her eyes and concentrated on the paper in front of him, which was an incredibly difficult task as he could still feel her eyes on him like a shadow. After much effort to divert his eyes to anywhere but hers, he failed and his greens fell back to her browns. He was surprised that she seemed more hurt than curious, and he wanted to tell her, to tell her that she was the reason for the anvil that was pulling at his heart and the odd fiery sensation that was eating at him.

"I'm gonna go get a Nutter Butter," McGee eased himself away from the intensity that was emanating from the two, which had turned out to become something very frequent lately.

"I'll come with you McHealthy," Tony replied almost immediately and sped to McGee's side. Ziva's eyebrows dipped in confusion as the two men wandered around the corner and left her on her own. Usually Tony would love the banter that would come forth and something in her clutched at his avoidance.

.::.

"My silver-haired fox, how nice of you to visit me," Abby said while she poked around in the evidence box. Gibbs mouth gave a little twitch that resembled a smile as he gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"I haven't done anything to deserve that yet Gibbs…" she accepted the Caf-Pow! and took a long savoring sip, "what's wrong?"

"Nothin', any luck on any of the evidence yet?" He followed her to her desk where she flipped up different boxes and rectangles.

"Sorry Gibbs," she turned towards him a twinkle in her eye, "Gibbs –" his finger came up to her lips to silence her, he gave a little chuckle and exited the lab. She heaved a sigh and turned towards her paper cutouts of the team.

"Something's up with my two favourite guys…"

.::.

"McGee, you're with me," Gibbs held up the address and strode off towards the elevator, "Hurry up Elf Lord!" McGee nearly tripped over his own feet as he grabbed his gear and slid through the elevator doors just in time.

Tony zoned out of the words that stained the brightly lit screen to waver over to his right for a glance at Ziva's form, but was perplexed when all he saw was an empty chair, swiveling from left to right.

"Looking for me Tony?" he knocked her on the head accidentally as he leaped out of his chair from shock.

"Oh my! I am so sorry!" his hand moved over to cup her face instinctively, her laugh exploded through the bullpen and she didn't seem to mind his gentle touch, "I told you never to sneak up on me!"

"It is okay Tony," the deep sound from her throat came to an abrupt stop as she realized his hand on her cheek and how close his face was to hers. His thumb softly moved over her smooth plane unknowingly, and he felt like just diving in to delve on those beautiful plump lips of hers. But he didn't of course, because that'd not only leave him with a very sore head but a possibly sore heart.

Her eyes said she would but her actions differed, she pressed her hand to his chest and kept them at a distance she considered "safe".

"Ziva," he spoke her name quietly, almost in appreciation of the sound that fell off his lips so easily. Once again they fell into that trance as they stared at each other longingly, the people around them all but forgotten. Eventually though, she straightened her arm, and broadened the distance between them, just far enough to not fall and get lost.

"My apologies," she gathered up the strength to let her hand slip from his sturdy defined chest and returned back to her desk still a little dazed at their short lived propinquity. Tony cleared his throat and lowered his hand from where Ziva's face had once been before he headed towards Abby's lab.

"I'll go check on Abby."

.::.

He strutted in his usual swagger tainted with distress and came to a sudden halt just beside the door; he turned and closed it with a light click.

"Wow this is a first," Abby looked at him curiously as he let out a shaky breath.

"Abby… I need your help, and I need your confidentiality," he leaned against the door, still deep in thought.

"I'm listening…" there was nothing but silence after that, and she wondered if he had let go the breath he had nervously held on to.

"It's about –"

"Ziva?" a smile propped into place as she squealed and jumped around the room.

"Abby! Get a hold of yourself!" he grabbed her by the shoulders and steadied her.

"You just leave it all up to me Tony," her eyes widened in excitement.

"Leave what up to you?"

"The plan!" she said a-matter-of-a-factly, "Look, I'm not stupid Tony, I know you would eventually ask her, it wasn't a matter of _if _but _when_," she pulled out a freakishly thick notebook and began to jot down words.

"What is that?" he inched closer to take a sneak peak.

"Well I was thinking, we should go all out, y'know everything! The flowers, the dinner, the chocolate, we'll pull the best Valentine's Day plan anyone has ever thought of!" her words came quicker and quicker as she got caught in her little world.

"Abby! No!" he shook his head, and her eyes dropped.

"What do you mean no?"

"I mean, this is difficult for me…" he confessed.

"That's why I'm helping you!" she laughed and began to scribble down on her notepad once again.

"No! I want to do this right…" and that brought Abby to a standstill, and she looked up at him expectantly, "Look, Ziva is more than just a 'girl' to me, and I don't want her to be another one of my one night stands… she's more to me than that."

"Okay Tony we'll do it your way, what do you have in mind?"

.::.

A/N: It's all yours Soph, have fun!


	3. Of Perfume and Secret Plans

**III. Of Perfume and Secret Plans**

_11 Days before Valentine's Day_

.::.

"What do you mean you don't wanna do this anymore?" Abby's voice was laced with indignation. "Are you getting _cold feet_, Tony?" She injected as much sarcasm into the two words as she could.

"Well, I…" Tony waved his hands around desperately, trying to find the right words to explain to Abby why he was deciding to back out of their plan after two days of careful planning.

Abby reached a hand into her skirt pocket and fished out her remote. There was a bleeping sound as her lab doors locked shut. "I'm not letting you leave until you tell me what's going on," she said firmly.

Tony groaned. He paced nervously around the lab. "She's Ziva, Abby."

"I know that! So?" Abby crossed her arms.

Tony made an odd whining noise. "Well, what if she rejects me?"

"Are you in high school, Tony?" Abby asked him impatiently. "She's not going to reject you!"

"You should've heard her talking to McGee today. She's perfectly happy being without a date. She wants to cook and relax at home, Abby! I don't wanna be the person who ruins her plans."

"You're not gonna ruin her plans!" Abby walked over to where Tony was and stared him in the eyes. "Tony, she would like you to ask her out for Valentine's Day."

Tony stared back at Abby. "How do you know that?"

"I don't. At least, not for sure. But I do know that the only way you're gonna find out is if you ask her out for Valentine's Day."

"I -"

"You're too far in to get out now." Abby said warningly.

"You sound like a Mafia boss," Tony muttered.

"How do you know what a Mafia boss sounds like?" She tilted her head. Tony opened his mouth to reply, but she interrupted, "Okay; before you start telling me about your Baltimore PD days, know that I'm going ahead with the plan whether you're in with it or not. So if you're not gonna do this, Tony? Ziva's just gonna be showing up on Valentine's Day and waiting for you for hours."

Tony frowned. "You know, you seem way too obsessed with this plan."

"I'm not. I'm just the glue that holds you, Ziva, and the plan together." She beamed at him. He grunted.

The sudden banging at the door made them both jump, and turn their heads to look at it.

"Abby?" McGee's voice called in. "Why is the door locked?"

"Just a second!" Abby fumbled with her remote and unlocked the door. She smiled brightly at McGee as he came in. "Hey, McGee."

McGee looked suspiciously from Tony to Abby. "What were you guys talking about?"

"None of your business, McGee!" Abby half-scolded as she went back to her computer station. "Tony and I just had some things to discuss."

McGee shook his head and looked at Tony. "Boss wants you. Says that there might be another case that's linked to the previous two murders."

"Oh, you're kidding!" Tony said incredulously. "You wouldn't think there would be so many petty officers to bend into different positions."

"Ew, Tony!" Abby said without looking away from the computer screen.

Tony grimaced. "Sorry." He beckoned to McGee. "Let's go."

.::.

The three male field agents stood looking down at the body on the ground, varying degrees of repulsion written on their faces. The body was contorted beyond belief, and barely looked human at all. Blood smear and spatter covered so much of the surrounding area that underlying objects were barely recognizable. Whoever the killer was, he or she was definitely getting more violent.

"Boss, I don't feel so good," McGee said, his voice shaking slightly.

Gibbs gave him a steely glare. "Go check out the other parts of the house."

"Uh…looking for what?"

"Evidence! Anything relevant to the case! This the first time you worked a scene, McGee?"

"No. Sorry, Boss." McGee meekly turned away.

"Stop apologizing!" Gibbs yelled after him. He returned his gaze to Tony. "DiNozzo, photograph. And when David gets here tell her she can start collecting blood samples."

"Got it, Boss." Tony decided not to make any extra remarks. Gibbs didn't look like he was in his best mood.

Gibbs strode away, and Ziva entered the room almost immediately afterwards.

"Where'd you go?" Tony asked rather grouchily. "Gibbs wants you to collect blood samples."

Ziva put down her evidence kit and took out her cotton swabs. "I went to the ladies' room."

Tony looked around puzzled. "Where? You can't have used the victim's bathroom."

Ziva shot him an odd look. "Next-door neighbour."

"Hmph." Tony snapped a photograph. "Well, you missed Probie's near barf episode."

"He nearly threw up?" Ziva swabbed some blood from the carpet.

"Yeah. He was looking a little green. Sorta like between apple green and – Ziva, stop." Tony gripped Ziva's arm, stilling her motions. "Stand up."

Ziva stood up. "Oh." She said in shock.

"Does that look like what I think it looks like?" Tony asked grimly, and they looked down at the blood-stained floor together.

"Yes, it does." Ziva's answer was in an equally grim tone. "A heart."

"Killer left a calling card this time," Tony murmured. Then he looked distractedly at Ziva and sniffed her neck. "Did you put on perfume?"

Ziva swatted Tony away. "Yes, I did."

Tony let go of her arm. "Next-door neighbour very cute?"

"I put it on before I came to work this morning." Ziva gave him a glance. "Next-door neighbour is a sixty-year-old man."

"Well. Maybe you like old men," Tony growled under his breath as he held up the camera to continue photographing.

"You got a problem with sixty-year-old men, DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked as he entered with a cup of coffee, Ducky and Palmer following him.

"No, Boss." Tony answered from behind the camera.

"Good, then maybe you can get back to work," Gibbs suggested. He turned to Ziva.

"The killer left a calling card." Ziva pointed at the heart-shaped smear.

Gibbs peered at it. "There weren't any calling cards at the previous two crime scenes."

Ziva nodded. "Normally, I would just say the blood smear is a coincidence, but -"

"We don't believe in coincidences," Gibbs and Tony said at the same time.

"But I knew you would say that." Ziva finished.

"Well, perhaps the killer left it there to try and confuse us," Ducky offered.

Gibbs turned around to face him. "Confuse us, Duck?"

"Yes…I would say that the killer's profile fits that of a serial killer, and serial killers sometimes vary their _modus operandi_ to throw the police off track. They -"

"If this is a serial killer we might have another victim soon." Gibbs looked at Ducky seriously.

"That is true." Ducky agreed sombrely. "Yes. In that case, Mr Palmer and I will get started on the body now." He led Palmer to the grotesquely twisted body.

"Tony, photograph the heart. Ziver, continue with the blood. Then finish up and get back to the Yard. And tell McGee to hurry up with the evidence collecting!" Gibbs left the room.

"Anybody think his mood's gonna get worse these two weeks?" Tony asked in a low voice.

"Well Tony, three ex-wives must not be easy to live with," Ziva said as she squatted down again.

"Very true, my dear. Mr Palmer, have you got the liver temperature yet?" Ducky took the probe from Palmer and read the temperature. "Anthony, my estimate puts this gentleman's time of death at around the same time this morning as the other two gentlemen."

"Got it, Ducky. Thanks." Tony finished photographing and watched as Ducky and Palmer loaded the body onto the gurney, and then wheeled the body out. Ziva finished swabbing the last of the blood and packed up her kit. Collecting McGee, they left the scene, the yellow-and-black crime scene tape blowing gently behind them in the breeze.

.::.

For the umpteenth time in three days, Tony closed the door to Abby's lab and leant on it while he collected his thoughts. Abby awaited his answer with wide eyes. Tony sighed. "Okay, we're on."

Abby whooped. "Did you hear that, guys? We're still on!" She grinned around at her equipment. "And that's your reward for working extra hard these few days."

"One condition." Tony broke into her mini celebration.

She smiled back at Tony. "Sure. What's the condition?"

"We don't tell Ziva."

Abby's smile vanished. "What? How do we not tell Ziva?"

Tony frowned. "I don't know. But we can't let her know."

"Why not?"

"Cause if she finds out she's going to do some weird black magic voodoo thingy and make everything go wrong."

"Ziva can't do black magic or voodoo, Tony."

"I know that. But she can still make things go wrong."

Abby threw up her hands in exasperation. "Tony, how do you propose we get Ziva to go out with you without you asking her out?"

"I don't know. Trick her into it?"

Abby studied Tony. "Do you know how desperate you sound?"

Tony let out his breath. "Yeah. But you've no idea how good she smells in perfume."

"What?" Abby asked in confusion.

"Nothing." Tony cleared his throat. "So, we gonna do this?"

"Absolutely. We'll do it, and we won't tell her. And you know what?"

"What?"

Abby's eyes twinkled. "I'm kind of excited."

.::.

A/N: Secret plans! :O Ooh...okay, just kidding. I won't tease you anymore. Let's see where Ash takes the next chapter!

A/N #2: On another note, a million thanks to everyone who read, reviewed, and favourited! Ash and I are blown away by the response our story has gotten. You guys are incredible! Have some heart-shaped chocolate, on us!


	4. Empty, Lonely, and You

**A/N:** It seems every time I take a break and come back to write I seem to change my style. Haha. Anyways I hoped you enjoy this,cause I had fun writing it.

.::.

**IV. Empty, Lonely, and You**

_9 Days before Valentine's Day_

.::.

He couldn't believe what he saw before his eyes. The empty abandoned warehouse was eerily silent with the occasional chirp from the infestation of insects in the dark corners. The echos made it all the more daunting as each singular sound ricocheted off the few wooden crates that were scattered around, rotting and decaying from years of abandonment.

He couldn't even reel his memory back to how he got to this place. All he knew was it was dark outside and somehow terrifyingly darker inside, where he stood, in front of another victim. But this time he knew the victim, and he cringed at the sight of the body twisting in such a dangerously painful angle that proves the human body was never made to withstand. A sudden rush of foamy liquid rose in the depths of his stomach and he pushed it down grudgingly, tasting the bitter flavor of half digested food as they sunk back down.

He blinked his eyes, and clung onto what could only be called hope that this was all just a sick dream or a whacked up hallucination, that the body in front of him was not sliced up and disjointed to the point where it nearly lost the form of a body. He rather he'd gone crazy because that would be a whole lot better than what presented before him. It didn't work though, and the brown eyes that stared back were dead as ever, but somehow it still seemed to plead for help and that made the guilt in him rise to an unbearable level, not taking into account from the fact that he didn't know how the hell this happened in the first place, but it just felt like it was _his_ fault.

It just didn't make any sense, nothing made sense, this was a serial killer they were dealing with. What happened to the patterns and consistency? The killer had taken four _males_, why suddenly a female? The puzzle pieces didn't fit. Ziva was not suppose to be dead, _he_ should've been.

And suddenly out of nowhere Gibbs and McGee crashed through the doors of the warehouse that presented itself more as a black hole. The steely blue eyes of his boss stared at him and inquired for an explanation. McGee was on his hands and knees and the lumpy liquid that was regurgitated out looked like clam chowder, but he could guarantee that it wouldn't of smelled a bit like it.

His eyes darted from his boss to McGee's retching body and finally to Ziva's dislocated form. As if being _over-runned, _the room began to spin around him and before he knew it he was flat on his back. His head met the concrete with a loud clap and it took a second later for the stars to register behind his eyes then altogether fading to a complete black that somehow seemed even darker than the world outside.

.::.

Sweat gathered around his forehead in armies and marched furiously down his face as he sat up in his bed. His heart was beating a hundred miles an hour and he was sure he was going to have a heart attack right then and there. He took gulping breaths for several minutes until all that was left was a cold, sweat drenched Tony DiNozzo in a king sized bed.

It had been happening for awhile now, these horrible nightmares, where everything seemed to go everywhere but right and it haunted him, left him vulnerable on the ground while it kept prodding and kicking him where it hurt the most; his heart. But it's been getting worse lately, and it definitely seemed to be coming from the day he both dreaded and desired. It was make or break.

He dropped his knees to the side of the bed; his body was still shaking but eventually settled down to a light shiver from the cold draft that wafted through from the gap under the door. He steadied himself up and stumbled towards the bathroom, where he slammed the door open and planted himself in front of the sink.

The scalding water felt like bliss on his skin and though it hurt, it felt gloriously good to know that he was still okay, that he wasn't numb. He turned off the gushing water and let out a sighing breath as he slid down the wall to a sitting position. His eyes wandered from the toothbrush that sat innocently by itself on the table top to the blank wall in front of him then to his right, where the door sat wide open showcasing a large empty room.

He ran his hand tiredly through his hair and even _that_ brought back memories of when _she_ touched his hair and how tremendous it felt for her little soft hand to play with the sandy brown strands then linger a moment longer. The feeling of loneliness was horrible as the room around him got bigger and bigger while the silence got ever more deafening. The water droplets that crashed onto the porcelain sink combined with the ticking of the clock and the wind that rivaled its way to his window drove him insane.

He stayed there until the first rays of the sun blemished the room, and as tired as he was, he stood with dark bags around his eyes and got dressed for work. Like always. Every single day.

.::.

"You're late and you look like crap DiNozzo," Gibbs glared at his senior agent, a flicker flashed through Gibbs' eyes when no witty remark came from the other end, not even a single sound. And though he didn't show it he was concerned for the younger agent and it was at times like this he wished he could show more emotion, or at least give a little advice but he'd done everything but right in this part of the heart. So instead, he grabbed his coffee and looked at the three then strode out of the bullpen, to somewhere less depressing.

All three agents sat silently at their desks as they resumed with their assigned tasks. It felt as if they were all competing to see who would last the longest, and soon enough the tension between the distance between Tony and Ziva's desk was well past overbearing and Tim stood to excuse himself.

"I'm gonna get some lunch, you guys want something?" He offered but was politely declined by both agents, which was weird in itself. McGee eased himself out of the bullpen knowing better to leave them alone because something was up and it didn't look like it was something to be caught up within.

After much debate with herself Ziva stopped her work and walked to the cabinet next to Tony's desk. She wanted to ask if he was okay, but such a question was dull, she knew he wasn't okay and he'd just lie anyways. So why ask a question she already knew the answer to? But before she could come up with another though, he spoke.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For everything I've done that hurt you," his eyes were glued to the screen. She stared at him, unsure how this all came about because he'd apologized before and she'd forgiven him. So why was he apologizing now?

"Did something happen, Tony?"

"Yeh, I got beat up," it was partly true, the emptiness inside him has been eating him up and it definitely showed.

"Just give me the name and I'll take care of it," he laughed but it lacked his usually buoyancy and that marked the end of their conversation when Gibbs reluctantly reentered the bullpen.

"Where's the Elf Lord?"

"Grabbing lunch." Ziva crossed back to her desk.

"It's 1100 –"

"I'm sorry about that boss, I think I might've scared him away," Gibbs gave him a look that somehow, miraculously gave the message of "don't apologize" and "ya think" all in one.

"DiNozzo go home, get some sleep."

"But –"

"You're doing more bad than good, go home, it's an order."

"Yes, boss." Tony packed his gear and walked unwillingly out of the office en route to the emptiness of his home once again.

"Don't make a habit of it DiNozzo!"

.::.

The apartment door squeaked open like a frightened rat scramming to its hideout as quietly as possible, and as it closed he was once again entrapped within the four walls he called home. He wandered over to his bedroom and sunk deep into the bed not caring for the bound to be wrinkles on his expensive suit. And he slept through the afternoon and into the night, until he could no longer.

It was the same dream again, or rather the same nightmare. But this time Ziva's eyes did not plead for him to help; instead they seemed saddened as if she pitied him, putting aside the fact that he was the one who stood and she, the fallen. McGee wasn't bent over hurling this time, no, this time he came in with a figure of a girl that he couldn't quite identify in the dark, and Gibbs came in with a redhead; but that was all he could see a mop of red hair over a shadow. And he can definitely understand what his subconscious has been trying to say, and the realization seemed to lift a heavy load off of his shoulders.

It felt like déjà vu because before he knew it he was flat on his back again, the stars flashed to its death and then he was gasping for air again. Sweat drenched his hair and the sheets and the repeat of the night before took place. But before he reached the end of his bed a familiar voice came from the corner of his room.

"So nightmares are what have been _beating_ you up."

.::.

A/N: Just wanted to say thank you very much for all the reviews! Leave one on the way out. =)


	5. If a Heart Bled Love

**V. If a Heart Bled Love**

_7 Days before Valentine's Day_

.::.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me!" Abby smacked Tony on his arm as soon as he closed the door to her lab, and he winced.

"What was that for? What didn't I tell you?" Tony rubbed his arm in an injured manner.

"You slept with Ziva!"

"What? We didn't sleep together, Abby!" Tony moved out her reach as she raised her hand to smack him again.

"Really? Cause a little birdie told me that her car was parked outside your apartment all night two nights ago! I have camera footage!" Abby stalked to her keyboard and hit a key, "There! Isn't that her car?" She gestured at the computer screen and glared at him.

Tony watched in amazement as the grainy black-and-white video sped through fast-forward and Ziva's car pulled to a park outside his apartment building. A tiny figure emerged from the car and entered the building, and the car remained in its place for the rest of the night. The video flickered badly, but there was no mistaking it; it was her car, and it didn't move at all that night. "Did you hack into a traffic camera or something?" Tony asked Abby incredulously.

"You don't want to know. The point is, how could you sleep with her and not tell me? You hurt me, Tony!" Abby gave him a grievous look. "Were we planning this together or not?"

"I didn't sleep with her, Abby! She stayed the night but nothing happened, okay?"

"Well then what happened?"

Tony groaned. "Do you have to ask?"

"Yes! What if what happened changes our plans?"

"It…doesn't." But he looked unsure.

"Then why do you look like that? Tony, will you just tell me?"

He sighed. "Fine."

"And don't leave anything out or I will find out from Ziva how to kill you with a paperclip and then kill you with a paperclip," Abby added.

.::.

"_So nightmares are what have been _beating _you up."_

_The familiar voice almost made him throw up, because she wasn't supposed to be here; she wasn't supposed to have seen him flailing in his sleep and she wasn't supposed to have heard his screams. He felt fear clench his heart and then suddenly he was angry at her, angry that she'd come here while he slept. That she'd deemed it her duty to check up on him. Because now she'd intruded into his private space, and she'd seen something very personal, and this was the one thing that he couldn't ever let her know about._

_Because there was no way he could ever tell her that he'd dreamt of her death. That there was a reason he'd been dreaming about her death. That he loved her and wanted her and needed her, and he feared losing her, and he feared being rejected by her even more. That he woke up in cold sweats every night, imagining again and again what it felt like to lose her. It didn't matter to what or whether the demons were real; all it mattered was that he tortured himself with them and he had to, because he was scared that once he stopped he would forget just how precious she was to him._

_It had been this way before. He'd loved her too much and thought about her too little. That was why he'd never made the first move; never taken the first step. He would never appreciate her presence in his life until he saw that she belonged to someone else, and then he would get jealous and try to get her back. He always did, except he knew that someday it would be the last time. So he'd finally decided to do what he should have done a long time ago. But he'd never known until he'd truly committed his heart to her how very hard it was not to fear not having her._

_He shuddered when she sat down beside him on the bed and laid a hand on his shoulder. Despite his sweat and the layers of clothing and the sheets entangled between his legs, he still felt horribly bare; horribly vulnerable, like an open book. He shut his eyes and prayed that she hadn't seen the millions of his hopes and dreams flash by in them, because if she had then she must know he loved her, and if she knew then she must loathe him, surely?_

_For how could she not loathe a man who could love her and not have the courage to show it? How could she not loathe a man who dreamt about her death every night because he dared not tell her to her face that she was what kept him alive? How could she not loathe a man who hadn't even the audacity to sweep her off her feet, shower her with roses, kiss her until the sun set, and tell her just how special she was?_

_He almost didn't notice when she started rubbing her hand up and down his back, trying to calm him down, trying to stop his shudders and his desperate gulping breaths. He tried to keep from thinking about the warmth and comfort her simple act gave him as he bent down and put his head in between his knees, willing away his dizziness. But it was too much, and all he wanted to do was to reach out and pull her into his arms. __Hold her forever. Just to keep her safe and with him. Just to tell her he loved her without really telling her. Just to touch her and kiss her and make her his for all eternity._

_And just like that, the hollowness returned, and he wanted nothing better than to go back to sleep and live through the horrible nightmare again so that he could see the contempt in her eyes at his foolishness for ever thinking he was worth her. For ever thinking he was strong enough to find a way to win her over._

"_Are you alright?" She sounded frightened, and he knew it was because she had never seen him like that before, so silent and still except for the ragged breaths that kept choking him. He didn't tell her that he'd spent months in that state when he'd thought she was dead._

"_I'm fine, Ziva."_

_Her eyes, fear-filled, searched his face. "What are the nightmares about?"_

_He breathed out slowly. "They're…nothing."_

"_Tony, you were screaming," she said quietly._

_He tried to ignore his racing heart and he tried to ignore her soft hand still on his back. "Yeah? Sometimes I do that."_

"_Not like this, I hope. You sounded like you were in pain."_

_He wasn't sure he really wanted to know. "What was I screaming about?"_

_She hesitated. "I heard my name. When you were about to wake up."_

_He turned away. "Damnit."_

"_What?" She asked in confusion._

"_I'm sorry, Ziva." He sighed._

"_For saying my name in your sleep?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Tony, it was a nightmare."_

"_Yeah." He didn't elaborate. He couldn't._

"_I am worried about you." Her single sentence echoed around the dark room, ringing in his ears. It settled in his stomach and lit up a fire, and he could feel the cold fog that drifted across his heart slowly lift. Here was hope, because here was more than pity or contempt. Here was worry, her worry for him. So perhaps she didn't hate him after all._

"_I'm alright." He cast her a slight smile, and it was the first genuine one he'd worn in days. Things felt better already._

_She must have known that, because she smiled back, and the worry in her eyes melted away. "I am glad, Tony."_

_It never ceased to amaze him how five years later, her smile still looked just as wonderful to him as it had on the first day that he'd met her. His heart thudded as he reached out a hand and threaded his fingers through her hair. "Thanks."_

"_You are welcome. You will tell me what those nightmares are about someday, Tony?"_

"_Yeah." He cleared his throat. "Ziva…can you please stay the night?"_

_She gazed at him in surprise, but then finally gave a nod. She patted the pillows gently, and he moved over to lay his head back down upon them. She took off her shoes and climbed into his bed, and snuggled up next to him. Her voice was soft as she spoke._

"_Just to keep the nightmares away."_

.::.

"Oh my God!" Abby squealed as Tony finished talking. "She so did sleep with you, Tony!"

"Not it _that _sense, Abby," Tony said exasperatedly.

"Bet you wish it had been," Abby retorted, "And this so screws up our plans."

"How does it?"

"Because now you have to tell her you love her!"

"_What_?" Tony squeaked.

"Tony, we can't just go on with our plans like nothing happened. Things have changed now! We have to adapt! Go with the flow!"

"But…" Tony spluttered, unable to find the right words to express what he wanted to say, "Isn't going on with our plans flowing?"

"No, it's not! Tony, what if she meets her other true love on Valentine's Day?"

Tony looked at Abby in alarm. "No."

"You see? So you have to tell her before that! _Carpe diem_, Tony! Seize the day!"

"Abby, you know you're crazy." Tony informed her.

Abby grinned at him. "Only in the best way possible. So are you going to tell her or not?"

Tony waved his hands around frantically. "But she's _Ziva_, Abby."

Abby made a sound of impatience. "Will you stop saying that? Honestly, I feel like Gibbs-slapping you sometimes. You gotta tell her _because _she's Ziva!"

He groaned. "There are so many ways in which this could go wrong."

Abby grabbed him by the shoulders, forcing him to look her in the eyes. "Tony, if you don't tell her, there's only one way in which this could go wrong. If you tell her, there are many ways in which it could go wrong, but also one way in which it could go right. And don't you think that one way is worth facing all the others?"

Tony looked back at her quietly, debating her words. He sighed. "Yeah."

Abby beamed. "Excellent! Tell me how it goes." She twirled away from him to her computer, hitting a few keys on her keyboard while humming happily. The distorted image on her screen vanished.

Shaking his head, Tony left her lab. He thought about Abby's advice as he pressed the button for the elevator. He didn't know if telling Ziva he loved her was the best move, but Abby was right. Ziva had been worth risking his life for, and now she was most certainly worth risking his heart for.

.::.

A/N: I almost forgot to post this! Haha. I hope you enjoyed it. Next chapter will be written by Ash. Please leave a review on your way out!

A/N#2: I know it's been said before, but you guys are so great that we have to say it again! Thanks to everyone who's read, reviewed, favourited, put out alerts, or otherwise supported us! We're truly amazed with the response we've gotten. You blow our minds away!


	6. Choke

**VI. Choke**

_6 to 5 days before Valentine's Day._

.::.

"I love you."

No.

"I adore you."

No.

"You are my life."

No.

"I uh…"

Maybe it wasn't exactly the wisest decision for him to practice his confession in the men's toilets. Especially when the subject of his love seems to be all too familiar with this room, and not to mention the strange looks he earned as agents from other departments walked in on him dedicating his love. To a mirror.

He had probably been dubbed the 'lovesick loner of the men's room', and a fact that he knew very well was that word around this building moves extremely fast; and usually the story gets tweaked, and he had a feeling he might hear a whole lot of crap from McGee and Ziva, which at this point would not be desirable.

He released an anxious breath and splashed his face with warm water, letting his tensed up jaw relax. This was all Abby's fault, why couldn't she just lay off a little and let him figure this out. But no, she had to whip out her freakishly thick book of fantasies and plan it all out for him; even though he'd outlined what he wanted she still managed to get it her way in the end, and it was absolutely useless to argue with Abby.

Then all of a sudden, realization hit him square on in the face, like an elephant shitting all over you. Why it hadn't occurred to him before? He didn't know, but now that it did, he was dedicated. Did Abby need to know he carried out _the_ plan to every specific word?

No. And he wasn't planning to. He was going to do this _his_ way, which consisted of acts on impulse, though sometimes they don't always result with the best outcome he'd hoped for, but that's the way he rolled. That made him a DiNozzo, not a Sciuto.

Finally, feeling a little more content with himself, he gathered his composure and exited the bathroom, where he walked straight into none other than, Gibbs, who now had a stream of spilt coffee down his green polo shirt. Perfect. Tony swallowed the lump in his throat as Gibbs stared at him full on; he was in for some sort of punishment, he knew it. Rule 23, version two. Never mess with Gibbs' coffee.

"How are ya DiNozzo?" Tony furrowed his brows in confusion, Gibbs was supposed to be angry, but he wasn't which definitely meant something was hinky.

"Did an alien eat you boss?" a slap was administered to the back of his head, "good to know that's not the case."

"Word's been goin' around about a madman scaring people in the head, going on and on about his," Gibbs hesitated, and that didn't happen very often, "homosexuality…"

"What?"

"There's been a few variations of that story."

"Well you have nothing to worry about boss, well not me in particular," Tony's eyes mistakenly fell past Gibbs' shoulders onto his partner at her desk, with her hand flipping through her smooth brown hair and then directed back to the screen to smack the thing silly, as usual. Even with such a violent action she still managed to look absolutely beautiful, and she seemed more stunning every single day.

He regretted letting his mind drift off like that, especially in front of Gibbs which was downright suicide, and it must've shown very obviously on his face as the cool blue eyes pierced deeper into his skin.

"Rule 12 DiNozzo," Gibbs walked around him and into the bathroom, "and get me another coffee!"

"Yes boss!"

.::.

"You're googling again," Ziva said nonchalantly, her eyes still focused on her screen as she typed.

"You mean ogling?" his smile grew wider; he adored it when she mixed her idioms up. First she'd look a little angry, which was scary but definitely worth it when followed by her cute expressions where she tries to correct her mistake and then questions the accuracy of each.

"So you are."

"Are what? David?" Gibbs strolled in with a fresh new shirt and coffee.

"Uhh boss, I got you a new coffee on your desk," Gibbs picked it up, tipped the lid open and inhaled the waft of unsweetened coffee.

"Thanks DiNozzo," the empty cup was flanked into the empty bin, "McGee, grab your gear." McGee was out of the bullpen within seconds, and was tailing right behind Gibbs into the elevator.

"So…" Tony broke the awkward silence their boss had just opened up, her eyes flickered from the report in front of her to him, "Valentine's edging closer, huh?"

"Yes it is…" she let the words linger out slowly. He gave himself a mental head slap, when had he become so nervous around women, that he couldn't even formulate a decent conversation?

"Any plans?"

"Not yet."

"You planning on getting plans?"

"That depends on whom with."

"Okay…" his voice quivered and that must've given her the upper hand on the situation; well she seemed to have had it since the conversation had started thanks to his nerves. She rose from her desk and placed the manila folder on Gibbs' desk before stalking slowly over to him.

"Are you trying to say something Tony?" her lips were inches from his ear and an involuntary shudder ran down his spine at the feel of her breath against his skin. He wanted to say the words and his head was screaming for him to say it, but his voice seemed to have different plans as always, and that's what got him into most of his troubles anyways. Though just as he thought he'd say something completely off topic or opposite of his intentions, it came out right. Well, sort of right, it was on the right track anyways.

"Yes," the look on her face told him she was definitely surprised at his response, he wasn't supposed to cave, they weren't supposed to turn this playful manner to the now serious one, "You know I'll always have your six, right?"

"Yes," her voice was soft as she leaned against his desk, "and I trust that you will always have my back."

Her pitch was perfect for him to play back but he couldn't find the words, he practiced everything in the fucking bathroom and all he could say now was nothing. It was such a good opportunity and it ran out right as he gained some sense into his thought. She pushed off of the desk and sauntered back to her side, safe from whatever it was that had been at the brink of playing out.

She had nothing to do until Gibbs came back and for once in her life she wished for paperwork, heck it could've been piles and piles of it and she' be glad. Cause now all she could do was stare at her partner who had just told her something sincerely, without out all the bull and jokes to steer and hide his messages.

And as hard as she tried she couldn't pull herself away from looking in his direction, something about him made her seem to draw towards him, like he had magically secured her in his hands and all she could do was follow.

It was a little awkward, as she had imagined, but then it sort of became sweet-like, it was surprisingly comfortable and when his eyes came up to meet hers once in awhile which was then followed by a quick quirk of the lips, it made it even more soothing. It was something genuine that the two had trouble with ever since they had met, maybe it was the circumstances, the wrong time, for goodness sakes they were enemies and that was the only genuine thing about it, about them, the rest was, as much as she hated to say it, deception.

Had she told herself that five years down the line she'd sit across from the same man, who she had slept with, bonded with, drank with, kissed with, she would never have believed it. Never would she have admitted to herself that she'd come to desperately _need _him, like her weapons, she just simply wouldn't be herself without them; she just couldn't imagine it.

And it was certainly proving more so now, especially after her little visit to his apartment a few days back, that had opened up a whole new door and now she was stuck in a maze she didn't know how to get out of. Her only way was to follow him, and though she would never show it, she was terrified and his company was enough to make her feel safe.

Then suddenly out of nowhere, in their contented silence he finally worked up the guts to speak and say what he wanted to say, which came at the best time possible.

"Do you wanna grab some dinner after work?" his tone was steady as he played with his hair, pushing it back and forth, side to side.

"Sure," she felt like she'd been released, though the pull from before was still as strong she'd gained back the power of her self control to look away and do something useful, because there was a killer out there and the poor family would definitely not appreciate that the agent working their case was busy ogling her partner.

.::.

Gibbs had finally given them the signal for them to leave for the day and Tony was debating whether he should update Abby on abandoning her plan. He decided not, she wouldn't be too happy and unhappy Abby was not something he wanted to deal with right now, and anyways this could still go very wrong. He turned off his computer and zipped up his bag before swinging it over his shoulder. With a little wink of the eye to confirm that they were still on, he exited the building.

Ziva on the other hand was the last one out of the office, based on two reasons, Gibbs had sent her on an errand which left her behind when she got back and secondly Gibbs couldn't know about their dinner. She frowned at that thought, this was just dinner. They'd done it many times before; there was nothing to hide, right?

.::.

When the elevator finally stopped at the car park she walked out and just as expected his car was still parked right next to hers. She rotated her head to the right to see his tall form against the pillar; he wore a smug grin on his face as he pushed off from the wall and walked towards her.

"Was wondering if you were gonna bail on me," his Italian shoes came to a stop next to her.

"Why would I? I would definitely much prefer to eat dinner with you," he smiled at that, did she deliberately choose those words or was he just overanalyzing them? Either way he was going to show her what it's like to be treated by a DiNozzo.

.::.


	7. The Things that Make a Difference

**VII. The Things that Make a Difference**

_2 Days before Valentine's Day_

.::.

Ziva nearly flew out of her skin when Tony's hand landed on her shoulder, and she jumped out of her chair, causing it to crash into the shelves behind her. "Tony!" She gasped, "When did you come up beside me?"

Tony blinked. "I thought you knew. Wow. I didn't know it was possible to do that to a ninja. Must be all that thinking you've been doing…what were you thinking about anyway?"

"Nothing," Ziva replied firmly, although her heartbeat picked up speed instead of returning to normal. She retrieved her chair and sat down upon it, looking up at him and trying not to betray any emotion. "Did you want to talk to me about something?"

"Yes." He leant down so that he could look right into her eyes, and that didn't help matters at all. "I was wondering if you would spend Valentine's Day with me."

Ziva's lips inadvertently parted. "Yes," she answered breathily, and wondered whether he would mind it very much if she were to lean forward and kiss him again.

"Awesome," he whispered, his breath warming her cheeks. It was a good thing he straightened up just then, or her thought might not have remained hypothetical for much longer. "I'll be at your place tomorrow night then."

"Wait," Ziva said haltingly, trying to snap out of her Tony-induced haze, "Valentine's Day is not tomorrow night."

"Yeah…I was hoping I could go into Valentine's Day with you?" Ziva wasn't sure if that was actually a request or an explanation, but the hopeful-puppy-like expression on his face made her want to laugh.

"Alright," she merely answered, the corners of her mouth twitching.

Tony grinned at her and went back to his own desk. Smiling, Ziva turned back to her computer screen, but as had been before he interrupted her, her thoughts were not occupied by work.

.::.

"_We have to go back to your apartment first," he told her as they walked towards their cars._

"_Why?" She frowned._

"_For you to change into something nicer. We're not going to a place where you can just walk in wearing cargo pants."_

_She eyed his tailored Italian suit up and down. "Well, I guess _you _are dressed for the occasion then."_

"_That's why we're not going back to my apartment." Tony grinned. "C'mon, it won't take more than half an hour. And after that we've leaving your car at your place and taking my car."_

"_Where are we going, Tony?" Ziva asked as she unlocked her car door._

"_You'll see." Tony got into the driver's seat of his car and shut the door, leaving her no chance to ask any other questions. Making a sound of annoyance under her breath, Ziva climbed into her driver's seat too._

.::.

The ringing of her desk phone made Ziva jump for the second time in the day, and she noticed Tony and McGee exchange glances from across the bullpen, as if concerned over her apparent lack of ability to concentrate on work. Biting her lip, she picked up the handset. "David."

"Ziva, have you seen Gibbs?"

"I have not, Abby. I thought he was with you."

"He's not, and he's not answering his phone either."

"I am sure he is fine. He probably just went to get some more coffee."

"Yeah. If you see him, can you please tell him I have something to give him?"

"Of course, Abby." Ziva was about to hang up when Abby spoke again.

"And Ziva?"

"Yes?"

"I'm super-mad at Tony right now, but I'm not mad at you, so I just wanted to congratulate you."

"Because you are not mad at me?" Ziva asked in confusion.

"No," Abby laughed, her voice carrying a hint of barely suppressed excitement, "Because of the kiss!"

Ziva froze, and she was frantically searching her brain for an appropriate reply when Abby hung up. Ziva returned the receiver to its cradle slowly and glanced over at Tony, who was watching her questioningly. She got out of her chair, giving him a significant look as she did so, and walked out of the bullpen; Tony waited a few minutes before leaving the bullpen too and joining her in their favourite conference room – the men's room.

.::.

_Soft light illuminated the entire place, glittering off the well-polished windows and the shiny marble surfaces. Ziva looked around the Italian restaurant as a waiter pulled out her chair for her, and she had to wonder why Tony had brought her there. It was an expensive place, and she was worried – money would be tight for her, even with her savings._

_Her worry vanished when she felt Tony's hand suddenly reach across the table for her own, and then she was filled with emotions entirely different. He made her skin tingle and her heart warm, but she had to resist the urge to pull her hand away. She didn't know what he meant by it, and wish as she might that he would hold her hand forever, she didn't think it would ever mean as much for him as it did to her right then. Yet somehow she couldn't bring herself to withdraw her hand; she needed the feeling of his skin upon hers for just that moment longer._

_He threaded his fingers through hers just then, and she looked up shocked. "What are you doing?" She asked shakily, praying that her face did not betray her beating heart._

_He studied her fingers. "I've never noticed how stubby your fingers are," he answered as he held up her hand and rotated it from left to right, and Ziva had to suppress a laugh. She knew he didn't really mean what he'd said; she knew he had said it to put her at ease. And he had succeeded. Because he was Tony DiNozzo, class clown. Because it was he who she loved. And because she now realized that nothing between them had ever been deception; they had been through the good and the bad and almost everything in between, but every single bit of it had been true. Every single bit._

_She relaxed into her chair and he put her hand back down, but his fingers were still laced in between hers and she found that she didn't mind it after all._

.::.

Ziva locked the door and turned around. "That was Abby."

"I know," Tony answered her, still looking nonplussed.

Ziva hesitated. "She…congratulated me."

"For what?"

"For kissing you."

Tony gaped at her, and Ziva was pretty sure that it was close to the expression she had been wearing. "She _what_?"

"How did she find out?" She frowned and ran through the different possibilities in her head.

Tony cleared his throat uncomfortably. "She does have a lot of sources."

The tone in his voice made her look up. "Did you tell her?"

"No!" Tony replied indignantly. "Of course not! Why would I tell Abby?"

"Well there has been word going around the building about some sort of plan…" Ziva said vaguely.

He stared at her. "You know about that?"

Ziva sighed. "Yes."

"How much do you know?"

"I am not exactly sure. There are many versions going around, and some are very strange."

"Why didn't you do anything to mess it up?"

"Well, I was going to, but then I saw you with your nightmares and decided that it must be hard for you-"

"So your staying the night…it was pity?"

"No, Tony." She pressed her hands gently to his chest. "I was really worried about you."

Tony gazed down into her chocolate brown eyes, and she gave him a slight smile. "Okay," he said quietly. He bent down and kissed her. "We're not telling Abby about this one."

"So you admit telling her about the first one?" Ziva whispered against his lips.

"No." He backed away slightly and took her hand. "I didn't tell her, but I'm pretty sure she hacked into another camera."

Ziva made a face. "I hope not. That would be very weird."

"The men's room, however, doesn't have a camera – I checked." Tony grinned.

"Did she chew you up for not telling her about the kiss?" Ziva asked.

"Hey, you got the phrase right!" Tony said in a surprised tone, and Ziva punched him with her free hand. "Ow. Yeah, she chewed me up. After that I came upstairs and asked you to spend Valentine's Day with me."

Ziva threw back her head and laughed. "I see. Come on, we have to go out before Gibbs kills us." She unlocked the door and dragged him out of the men's room, not caring that McGee was gawking at their still linked-together hands as they passed by him.

.::.

_They took a walk along the Washington Channel after dinner, and it was peaceful and calming. It wasn't at all like Ziva had imagined having more than a casual dinner with Tony would be. He had treated her like a perfect gentleman should have; paid for her meal, which had surprised her, and helped her into her coat, which had astounded her. It had freaked her out, but he had continued on with his movie quotes and jokes like nothing was different, and that had made her think that maybe there was nothing to be afraid of in the first place. Maybe something more with him didn't mean that anything had to change._

_But she still had no idea if there _was_ something more, because there he was, walking beside her, giving her all the right signals and the wrong words. And she was a woman, after all, so just for once she wanted to get to hear him say the right words. His hand was still wrapped around hers and it was making her heart skip a beat every so often, but she had to wonder if it would be the last time; if the Valentine's Day plan rumour was just that – a rumour, and if tomorrow she would have to go back to work and watch him chase the newest agent in skirts and pretend she couldn't still remember how it felt like to have his hand around hers._

"_Have you ever wished upon a falling star?" His voice rang clear in the quiet night, and she stopped and stared at him. He was gazing up at the night sky. "I did that once with my mum before she died," he explained without looking down._

"_Oh." Ziva paused. It was such an un-Tony-ish thing to say that she didn't quite know how to respond. "What did you wish for?"_

"_A pet dog. I really wanted one but my dad wasn't too fond of things with fur."_

_Ziva snorted._

_His green eyes met her browns. "I also wished for the chance to find my true love."_

.::.

"Gibbs," Ziva called him without looking up from her typing, as she sensed him enter the bullpen, "Abby is looking for you."

"I know. She found me." His disgruntled voice made her glance over at him, and she was taken aback to see him holding the largest bouquet of black roses that she had ever seen before. He laid them down on the table and strode out of the bullpen, and the three remaining agents stared after him as the elevator doors slid shut.

"Why do you think she gave them to him?" McGee asked in wonderment.

"She probably thinks it'll make him feel better about Valentine's Day and his ex-wives," Tony proposed, and McGee frowned in his direction.

"Since when do you know Abby that well?" He asked.

"I've always known Abby that well," Tony retorted.

"I think I'm gonna go find Abby." McGee slipped off his chair and headed towards Abby's lab.

"He's jealous," Tony whispered wickedly to Ziva as they watched McGee's retreating back.

Ziva chuckled. "Should I be too, Tony?"

"Never, _tesoro mio_."

Ziva narrowed her eyes at him before going back to work. "Do not start with the silly pet names," she warned him. She would never admit that she secretly cherished them. Nor would she ever admit that the blazing intensity of his green eyes had already left her in a pool of melt.

.::.

_He said nothing else that night. There was no dramatic declaration of everlasting commitment or exploding fireworks or grand background music, but Ziva understood Tony, and she understood what he was trying to tell her. And she understood how hard it was for him to do it, because it was just as hard for her, and she admired him for his courage. They still acted as normal when they went to work the next day, but she found that she no longer feared him chasing the newest agent in skirts._

_They solved the case the day after that; caught the guy who was obsessed with killing every petty officer who reminded him of the man his wife had left him for. It was a case which shook each and every one of them to the core, because they could very clearly see how her leaving had turned his world upside down and practically driven him insane. And it scared them that such a simple act; such a simple leaving, a simple goodbye, could rip open a hole so deep and dark in a person's world that the person could fall inside and never be able to find their way out again. There was no satisfaction in putting him away. There was only an overwhelming sense of sadness._

_The case took its toll on all of them, and it was not surprising when Tony asked Ziva if he could hang out at her place. They ordered pizza and watched a rented movie, like they had done together as friends for years, but this time was different because each sought a new kind of solace in the other that they had never before. And it did not surprise her either when he leant over and kissed her._

_What did surprise her was how much she liked it. It was tender and loving and it made her head spin, and made her feel as if her whole life finally made sense. As if he was the piece she had been missing, or perhaps he wasn't even that; he was simply the glue that held all the broken pieces of her together, that made her complete, that made her whole. That made her, ultimately, who she was._

.::.

Gibbs let them off work when he came back. Ziva smiled at Tony as he approached her desk. There were no pretences between them now, no walls; just like how it should always have been, except what made the difference now was that they knew it. And it frightened them, but they wouldn't have turned back the clock for the world because doing so would have been like tearing a hole in their own lives. They were in for one hell of a rollercoaster ride, but it was one that they would go on with no other.

"Dinner?" He asked.

"Sure," she answered.

.::.

A/N: Lesson in _i__taliano_ - _Tesoro mio_ is "my treasure".

My last chapter for this story! There's still Ash's next chapter, of course. Thank you to everyone who read, reviewed, favourited and put out alerts! I hope you liked this chapter, because all the flashbacks actually made it hard to write. Please leave a review! So I won't feel sad and lonely :)

Love,

Soph


	8. VDay

**A/N:** Last Chapter everybody! Heads up for spoilers on last week's episode (A Man Walks into a Bar). Enjoy!~

*For the purposes of this story "Ray" does not exist.

.::.

**VIII. V-Day**

_The day before and the day._

.::.

"_Her footsteps sunk deep into the white slush, yet another one forgotten; the wilted rose petals fell onto the harsh, snow covered ground as the last of winter fell. It was amazing how when he was born he came in alone, innocently, holding his breath. And now, when he left, he left alone, innocently, on his dying breath._

_Fin."_

Ziva let out a deep sigh and masked the yawn that threatened to escape her lips; she shut the book close and placed it on her side table. The clock now read 0423; it was Monday. And he hadn't showed up like he had said he would. Her heavy, tired lids had been begging for her to turn in for the whole night and into the wee hours of the morning, and she finally complied reluctantly. She was angry, heck infuriated!

Normally she'd have been on her run by now, but she was incredibly thankful for the director to let them off today, it wasn't usual for him to act so kindly on them. For the past few years they'd been stuck at their desks doing paperwork. But he had any cases that came in today re-directed to the back up team, saying something about how hard they'd been working. But she was more convinced it was something to do the psych evaluations that they had just gone through the past week.

She wasn't going to lie, what she told Rachel was a truth that she hadn't really come to terms with. Just a few days ago she wouldn't have ever thought what she hoped for could ever happen, that she'd ever find that constant in her life. But she was faced with the scary truth that no one really ever dared to push on her, to tell her indirectly but still so blatantly clearly that her partner was the person that had influenced her work, her life.

And that washed most of the anger away and the atypical frown that wore on her face a minute ago faded. With her eyes still shut she turned to the empty side of her bed, wishing that he was there, because the empty void in her was getting old and tired. She was sick of it eating at her, slowly hollowing her out until she convinced herself that no one could ever take on such a task to complete her. Yes. It was too much to ask for; clearly.

With a sudden change of thought, her eyes flickered open and the investigator in her took control. She gave herself a mental head slap for not even considering that maybe he was in danger and then a bigger head slap came when she realized she hadn't even attempted to call him. It was strange because he would've called, and he didn't.

.::.

"Please let me out, please, please, please…" his fingers clawed at the cold slippery metal, it was a futile thing to do, but it gave him that little hope to hang on to, and hung on he did, strangled it until he was sure it was dead in his hands, but it was a little hope at least. A dead one. It killed him to know that he broke his promise once again, bad things seem to seek him out specifically and for some reason made sure they found him just at the worst time possible.

After trying about everything he could, the door was still unwilling to give in and the power still had obviously not returned. He wondered if anyone knew he was still here, especially given more than half the office wouldn't be in today and for once he wished they would.

He would've called or texted, anything to tell her, but as always bad things had bound to happen to him and he somehow left his phone that spent its life in his pocket in his drawer.

"Okay elevator…" he sat down and leaned against the chilly surface, "I'll make a deal with ya, I'll give you a hundred bucks if you let me out. Deal?" He stood again, and stared it down as if he was in one of those western cowboy movies, with the ball of hay rolling by.

With the little energy he had left from all his efforts he gave a final bash at the door, mostly out of fury but it seemed to have done the job. It had to be a miracle; the metal case jerked to life and began to descend downwards; which was opposite the way he was hoping for, but either way he was glad it was moving again. It came to a smooth stop and the doors slid open like it always did, he sprinted out, glad to be on real solid ground again.

After a seconds' consideration he darted up the flight of stairs, taking them three by three until he reached their bullpen. Though a little out of breath he grabbed his phone from his desk and scurried back down the steps, it hadn't taken him longer than five minutes, Ziva would've been proud of him.

He hurried along as he glanced over the missed calls, his car was the only one that sat in the car park, and he allowed a little grin to spread across his face, because though he'd spend the longest amount of time to get to the bullpen he was headed to _her_ place. And that was all that mattered.

.::.

Murky brown eyes revealed themselves slowly, adjusting itself to the darkness that still absorbed the room. In the deafening silence she could hear her front door clicked close, and she couldn't help it but grab at her gun that sat by her side table and hide it underneath her pillow. The clock glowed a dim 0514. Still a little unfocused, she left her back facing the door as the sound of water running ran through her apartment, followed by a quiet clinks of dishes.

With a released sigh her grip on her weapon loosened and her tensed body relaxed into the soft springs. It was a few minutes later when she'd drifted into a shallow slumber that she heard her door open quietly and then close with a silent hush that she barely heard.

She knew it was Tony; his scent was all too familiar to her by now. But she was still a little nervy by the fact that he'd entered into her apartment, bothered to even clean her dishes and then do what he was about to do next. She'd never felt like this before, felt like she was truly loved and not just of her, but her life, where she'd established herself.

Was she still angry at him? Yes. But she knew he'd have a good excuse. And that was another problem that had her worried, would she let this be permanent, would she overlook everything? She still hadn't allowed herself to give, fully, completely, because it had always returned back and bit her and she couldn't live through that again.

Her thoughts were all swatted away when he slid in behind her, in his singlet and boxers. That was what she loved about this, about them, that when he was next to her those doubts and uncertainties seemed to evaporate into thin air, and all that mattered was then and there.

She couldn't fight the smile that crept to her face when she felt him carefully maneuver himself as to not wake her. But then she turned and it all became serious. And suddenly his eyes found hers in the little light that the moon provided through her shut blinds. It was obvious that he knew how she felt when his eyes sagged and he grabbed her hand. She flinched away, the hurt in his eyes made her regret doing so.

She retraced her steps and linked her hand into his once again, and that was enough of a signal for him to raise his other hand to her cheek where she moved into his touch.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," his husky voice broke the eerie silence and then followed by his deep chuckle from the bottom of his throat.

"Try me," she was surprised by how soft her voice was compared to his.

"I got stuck in the elevator." There was complete silence between them as they both read each other, he was searching for something to tell him that she'd forgiven him, and stubborn as she was she wasn't giving him any of it. But then out of nowhere she let out her infectious laugh that had him tingling inside.

"Really." It was more of a comment to herself than a question to him. She separated their hands and pulled away from his touch, a wave of concern crossed his face as she turned her back towards him. Unsure of what he had just done wrong he turned to look up at the ceiling, then abandoning the fear of being greatly hurt he leaned over her shoulder.

"Are you angry at me?" she let out a muffled sound that he couldn't have mistaken to be no. He was confused and anger was beginning to rise in him, what did she really want from him?

"I'll leave if you want me to."

"Don't do that." Her wave of hair turned from him and he met her face straight on, and for the first time that morning she looked at him honestly. And she really was hurt by his actions, he should've apologized.

"This wasn't how I planned to start off today."

"I know." Words were not something she could explain herself further with, and there was no longer any need for them as they have become so accustomed to. She hugged herself into his neck, and he pulled her closer and placed a longing kiss on her forehead.

.::.

When she finally woke she was surprised and a little disappointed by the absence of Tony, her eyes glanced around her lightly lit room to find it empty. She stumbled across the distance from her bed to the door, the smell of pancakes floated into the room as she poked her head out. She allowed herself a smirk as she crossed the wooden floorboards to the kitchen.

She crept up, silently watching him as she leant against the countertop and he turned and gave her a genuine smile that she had never really seen before; one filled with content and pure happiness, she bit her lip to hold back her growing smile. He turned off the heat and sidestepped to place his hands on her hips.

"Breakfast at home or out?" he said jokingly, but something hit her as he said the word _home_. Her home now included him, with her, that's what home was; them.

"As long as we have breakfast I do not mind,' she played along.

"Okay home it is," he plated up the pancakes and topped them with a good dollop of butter and maple syrup, "I know I should've planned something really special for you today, but –"

"No, I want today to be just normal, just us." She shrugged it off and took a generous bite of the stack of pancakes; she let the sweetness explode in her mouth before commending him on a job well done. He laughed and with his thumb, he wiped at the corner of her mouth before placing a tender kiss to her lips.

"_Happy Valentine's Day, my sexy assassin ninja." _

.::.

A/N: Both Soph and I would like to thank you all for coming on this ride with us, it's been such an awesome journey and we will hopefully hit that 100 review mark! So for now we'll say good-bye, but we shall return with more in the very near future!~

*Take a piece of cake and a glass of champagne on your way out* =)


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